21 Long Distance Relationship Gifts for Humor-loving Couples

When you’ve been in a long-distance relationship for a few months, you may find yourself becoming a little complacent about how you treat the other person. How do you keep that from happening? How do you keep things fresh and exciting? If you feel your remote romance cooling off, here are some long-distance relationship gifts that will make your overseas love laugh, cry, or cry laughing!

Make Your Man Laugh until He Cries with These Quirky Long-distance Relationship Gifts

#1 – Personalized Boxer Boxer Briefs

 

boxer briefs - personalized and naughty

A picture says a thousand words, so if you’re a fun-loving couple that’s just a little bit risqué, why not send a pair of these devilish drawers to the man in your life? Just be careful he doesn’t start taking his pants off wherever he goes, just to show off his “wears”. It’ll be on you!

#2 – Butt Face Combo Soap and Towel

 

Butt Face Towel and Soap 2pc Combo Set gift ideas

Does your better half on the other side of the proverbial pond often get confused about where he begins and where he ends? This clearly marked duo of soaps and a towel will set him straight. It makes for great hygiene and a couple of giggles while he’s soaping up or toweling off.

#3 – Hidden Hip Flask

 

We’re still on the topic of booze, are we? Sure, why not? This great idea works really well if you hide the hip flask in a very serious book, like Leo Tolstoy’s War and Peace. The book is fat enough to ensconce a nice little flask. If you’re shipping it overseas, though, make sure the flask empty! For the incorrigibly irreverent, why not use a B*bl*? Sorry to not spell it out – not really a keen fan of getting struck by lightning!

#4 – Literary Insult Chart

 

A literary insult chart? What’s that, you might ask? It’s simply a visually categorized collection of the most offensive obloquies from literary giants of the past; an encyclopedia of edgy zingers from just about everyone – from Churchillian chillers to Shakespearean scorchers, your guy will laugh his ass off with these titillating taunts and brutal burns! He’ll laugh so much he’ll start to cry, and then he’ll go and blast out a few of these blasphemous bombasts on his best buds over a beer.

#5 – Beer Belly Fanny Pack

 

beer belly fanny pack funny gift ideas hilarious gifts

Yup, it’s really a thing. These hilarious beer belly bum packs are a riot. Your man will be ROFL-ing when he gets this. Available in multiple skin tones and varying levels of hairiness and can hold at least a couple of cold ones – it’s as close to a true beer belly as you’ll ever want him to grow!

#6 – Tacos Can be Pun, Too!

 

taco custom t-shirt

If your man’s a foodie and loves tacos, he’s going to wear this tee every chance he gets. It might be a good idea to get it in a size that’s just a little tight for him – sure, why not rub it in while you’re at it. Ole!

#7 – ‘He Nose How to Have Fun’ Paper Cups

 

nose cup gift

Originally branded as “pick your nose” paper cups, these now come in a variety of options, including animal snouts and bird beaks. They make excellent party cups and are guaranteed to get people in the mood. Get a set of 24 and have them shipped to your beau overseas.

#8 – Granite Whiskey Stones

 

granite whiskey stone set gift for boyfriend

Your boy loves his booze chilled but hates that watery feeling when the ice melts. “Finally,” he’ll say, “a woman after my own heart.” With these whiskey stones now at his beck and call, all he has to do is chill them out… and then chill out with them! Guaranteed to at least make his eyes tear up. Warning: Sensitive men may end up bawling like babies when they see this in the mail! For that fussy whiskey or wine lover, these are probably the coolest long-distance relationship gifts you can come up with. Literally.

#9 – Lipstick-marked Sandwich Bags

 

printed sandwich bags - lipstick marks

It’s not actual lipstick, mind you. These printed sandwich bags will give your shy guy a nice little conversation starter at work during his lunch hour. Who knows, he might even think of you for all of 12 seconds before getting whisked away by the office vamp! Are you having second thoughts about it now? Read on…

#10 – Boozy Binoculars

 

binoculars hip flask

If your remote Romeo has been wondering how he can carry his tipple on those weekend hikes without alerting park authorities, this is one of the best long-distance relationship gifts for him. Just to be safe, give him a good answer to use when someone asks to borrow his binoculars. They might end up seeing double.

#11 – Good Morning, Mr. President!

 

Donald Trump mug

Who doesn’t love being lied to by political royalty? This is what the long-distance love of your life should see when he wakes up. You DO want him to wake up with a smile, don’t you?

Make Your Woman Tear Up or Light Up with One of These Quirky Long-distance Relationship Gifts

#12 – Daily Rant Journals

 

daily rant journal set

Too scared to tell your faraway forever love that she complains too much? Try these “note-so-subtle” notebooks and get away with murder! She’ll be dying to share her pet peeves on your next FaceTime call. But if they’re mostly about you, don’t say you weren’t warned.

#13 – Miniature Desk Vac

 

mini desk vac

These adorable little tabletop USB vacuum cleaners are great conversation pieces for her workstation in the office. They make excellent long-distance relationship gifts for all those tidy Theresas and spotless Suzies out there. Yup, she knows we’re talking about her.

#14 – Shower Squids

 

shower stuff holder squid design

A set of these for her shower stall will be much appreciated. Each squiddy holds up to 9 items and can save a lot of space in the shower. Practical yet playful.

#15 – Funny Coffee Mug

 

personalized coffee mug

Need to tell your long-distance lover that she has a mouth to make a sailor blush? Try this oh-so-subtle coffee mug as a long-distance relationship gift for your lovable gutter gab – I dare you!

#16 – Notes from a Fetus

 

what to expect when you're expected - parody pregnancy book

A hilarious parody of the best-selling book, What To Expect When You’re Expecting, this rib-tickling tome tells the fetus in your wife’s womb what to expect during the first three trimesters. Great advice, but the content has to be delivered by the mother. Duh! Why is that, you ask? Well, that’s because your kid can’t read yet, you over-ambitious wannabe child prodigy’s Daddy!

#17 – Homemade Porn for Women

Porn For Women | Cambridge Women's Pornography Cooperative ...

You can buy this one online but it works beautifully when it’s a personalized long-distance relationship gift. We suggest compiling a collection of printed-out selfies – wait, don’t take your pants off just yet – of you mopping the floor, doing the dishes, making a cup of tea, or taking out the garbage. Stick the photos in a journal titled ‘Porn for [Her Name Here]’ and ship it off to her so she can get her juices flowing as she gawks open-mouthed at her fave guy doing the one thing that makes men attractive to women. Housework!

#18 – Donut and Coffee Mug

 

funny coffee and donut mug prank gift gag gift

Has your wife been complaining to you during your bi-weekly Skype calls that she can’t walk around in the morning with her coffee and a donut while checking her Snapchat on her phone? This might be just the thing she was looking for.

#19 – Quarantine Sandwich Bags

 

printed sandwich bag gag gift idea

The “Quarantine” printed sandwich bags are guaranteed to thwart that office sandwich thief your wife’s been complaining about. A little dark humor around the coronavirus threat never hurt anyone! Warning: This product might get your wife into trouble at work. Also available in a “Crime Scene” variant.

#20 – Long-distance Boyfriend Pillow

 

long-distance couples boyfriend pillow

She needs an arm to snuggle up to or a shoulder to cry on but you’re thousands of miles away? No problem, let this ‘boyfriend arm’ do the heavy lifting for you. Guaranteed to make her smile, even when she’s sad.

#21 – Bad Ass Knee-high Socks

 

pink knee high socks with bad ass print

Let your lady walk the talk with these ‘a-hole-repellent’ socks. Wards off all kinds of freaks and pervs while your girl is away in another country traveling or working.

These tasteful long-distance gifts for him and her will squeeze out every last drop of that missing zing from your long-distance love life. They’re fun, they’re affordable, and they’ll invariably make more of an impression than you can ever imagine. Just make sure that your bae loves a good laugh and won’t be offended by your thoughtful and practical (NOT!) gift ideas.

For a truly touching long-distance relationship gift, why not consider our friendship lamps? Touch yours and your lover’s lamp will light up no matter where in the world they are. Operates on Wi-Fi connectivity. Check out our special offers.

Perfect Gifts for Long-distance Couples: Secrets of LDR Gifting

You’re thousands of miles away from the one you love and it’s tearing you apart every time you get on Skype or FaceTime to fill that aching gap. For new long-distance couples, this can be the very definition of hell on earth. Your soulmate is supposed to be with you – mentally, physically, and spiritually – but circumstances dictate that you remain separate. Nobody who hasn’t been through the experience can know what it’s like. But there’s some good news to give you solace: gifts for long-distance couples, when done right, can go a long way in alleviating the ache born of that gap.

Other long-distance relationship issues aside, we now know that gifts can transmit immense positive psychic energy when physical proximity is not possible or practical. But finding perfect gifts for your faraway lover or spouse isn’t always that easy. You could browse the Internet for gift ideas, of course, but how do you make a gift extremely personal? That’s why we’ve decided to draw you a roadmap to find the best long-distance gifts, with some suggestions strewn along the way.

Long-distance Gifts for Couples to Develop Greater Intimacy

To begin with, ask yourself what type of gift can evoke memories of the times when you were able to spend precious days with each other in between those long stretches of loneliness? What gift can you give that brings you mentally closer to fill the glaring physical void? Are there gifts that can get you both to have the same experiences at the same time? Or gifts that can bring some psychological consonance and closeness to a relationship where distance is the greatest challenge? How can you leverage technology to bring you mentally closer to each other?

That’s what we’re going to explore today in this article. If you look closer, you’ll see that many of these gift ideas leverage the power of our senses to bring a feeling of proximity and invoke a sense of intimacy. It’s a concept called senses gifting and has been around for a while, but few people realize the immense power that senses gifts can have on the giver as well as the receiver.

Visual Gifts to Invoke Positive Memories

The first type of gift – and probably the most obvious one – that works well for a long-distance couple is one that can give both of you a visual treat. We’re talking about photos of each other that you send on private chat or email that can be saved as wallpapers or screensavers on your phone or your desktop. It can serve as a constant reminder to the other person whenever they use their phone or log in to their computer.

Visual gifts like these can bring up powerful memories of your time together but they have to be done just right. Look your best and snap your better side to give your girl or guy a more positive and appealing memory of you. You know that story of native Americans refusing to be photographed because they were afraid it would steal a piece of their souls? That’s a myth at best but if it were true, wouldn’t you rather have your lover in a distant land see the better side of your soul?

You can also take it up a notch and send a photo collage that will put a smile on distant lips. Use humor to spice it up. If there’s a special look or glance that fires up her memory, use that. If a particular pose of yours stirs his loins, don’t be too shy to send that one. Try to send stuff that you know they’ll like, not just any random selfie that you took that morning with your hair looking like a badly built bird’s nest. Plan it out and curate the best ones, and then use an app like Diptic or PiZap to put them together in the form of a montage. Be creative and have fun with it.

 

long distance couples photo idea

If you’re a little more tech-savvy (or even if you’re new to it), you can try creating a video montage of clips showing your time together or even while away. There are tons of video editing apps that let you do it right on your iPhone or Android device, such as Adobe Premiere Clip and Vidstitch, that are user-friendly and don’t require any sort of expertise. Remember, you don’t have to be ↓↓↓THIS GUY↓↓↓ to make great movies!

Steven Spielberg using his smartphone camera to record something

Long Distance Experiential Gifts

Technology is all around us. Use it! Why not consider amping up your gifting skills with the help of virtual reality or VR? Sites like AltspaceVR offer apps where you can create private rooms, spaces, and worlds, and even interact with each other with activities like painting or playing video games. There are also apps like RizortVR, vTime, and portals like Oculus Rooms and Mozilla Hubs where you can upload a 360 photo and explore that with your faraway spouse or lover or set up a private space for just the two of you.

Of course, you’ll need the hardware to enter these virtual worlds so buy a pair of Oculus Rift or Oculus Go HMDs (head-mounted displays) and have the second one shipped to your partner. VR headsets are not that expensive nowadays and you can easily get one for a couple of hundred bucks per unit. It’s a great investment and it gives you the opportunity to spend virtual time with each other. If money is not an object you can try some high-end devices like the Valve Index VR full kit or an HTC VIVE Pro. Most of them piggyback on third-party VR apps or offer their own.

Strictly speaking, experiential gift ideas means you gift an experience rather than just “stuff” or material things. This involves gifting an experience that the other person hasn’t yet had. For instance, if you love whitewater rafting but your spouse in another country has never done it before, why not gift them a kayaking experience that you booked online near their location? It doesn’t have to be a strenuous physical activity or a dangerous sport; for example, you can buy him a ticket (with popcorn and soda delivered right to his seat!) to a movie you love but he hasn’t seen before. A lot of multiplex movie theaters today offer such dine-in seating that he’ll absolutely love.

Such an experience will not only give both of you something to talk about but also deepens the relationship by helping the giftee understand and appreciate a point of view that’s important to the gifter and different to their own preferences. It’s a powerful gifting idea that you should definitely try at some point. However, be careful not to gift them an experience that you clearly know they won’t enjoy – like a skydiving session for a person with vertigo or acrophobia. Duh.

Touch-friendly Gifts for Long-distance Couples

Our tactile sense is one of the most powerful of the five. When triggered in the right way, it can be quite satisfying. In fact, the lack of touch is one of the very things that makes a long-distance relationship so hard to bear. Did you know that the sense of touch can tell your brain to release endorphins, a class of “happy hormones”; or that touch is the first sense to develop in a human fetus, at about eight weeks?

That means when you were a little bitty embryo in your mama’s womb looking like something Sigourney Weaver would have shot at…

LDR couples - eighty-week-old human fetus

 

…is when you developed the first of your five senses. Not the most flattering analogy, I’ll admit, but it was fun, right?

Gifts for long-distance couples that involve the sense of touch in some way can be a fantastic emotional trigger for most people. Try something like a touch lamp or a weighted blanket. If you don’t know what these are, a touch lamp or friendship lamp is a set of two lamps where if you touch one lamp, the other automatically changes to a preselected color. And the lamps can be thousands of miles apart, linked to separate Wi-Fi connections. One for you and one for your better half. And it’s quite affordable as well.

5 Best Long-Distance Friendship Lamps - Lights for Long-Distance BFFs

A weighted blanket is basically what it sounds like. Little discs or pellets are sewn into layers of fabric to make the blanket settle around you and give you the feeling you’re being hugged. It’s a great experience but it’s only sensible if your wife, husband, or lover lives in a cold climate or sleeps in an air-conditioned environment. Studies have shown that weighted blankets can increase the level of serotonin, another “happy hormone” that can make you feel safe, comfortable, and relaxed. You can see why it would make an appealing long-distance relationship gift idea.

Olfactory Memory Joggers for Overseas Lovers

If you have a nose for it, you can try some olfactory teasers to give your loved one a lingering smell that reminds her of you. Roses? Boriiiiing! Try something more personal, like hyacinths to remind her of the flowers you used at your wedding? It doesn’t matter what kind of flower it is as long as it is linked to some shared memory.

Perfumes are another great idea. Is there a particular fragrance he loves on you? Why not send him a bottle of that so he can get a whiff of you whenever he feels lonely? You can also send perfumed items like scented aromatherapy oils. Just make sure it’s a smell that will invoke a powerful memory of when you were physically together.

Why is this a great gift idea for long-distance couples?

 

The sense of smell can trigger emotions and memories far better than any sense. The geek’s explanation for that is the fact that it is the only one that skips the brain’s ‘relay station’, the thalamus, and goes straight to the olfactory bulb; in turn, this is connected to the hippocampus and the amygdala. In layman’s terms, our sense of smell is akin to the sense organ of the very first single-celled organisms that populated the earth’s bio-broth, technically known as the Primordial Soup, from which all living things are thought to have originated.

That’s why certain smells are so intoxicating and heady. Find that smell and gift it. It works.

Aurally Stimulating Gifts for Long-distance Couples

If our eyes are the windows to our souls, then our ears are a direct route to our hearts. Studies have shown that our sense of hearing is a far better vehicle for emotion than sight. We’re better at detecting emotion when we only have access to sound rather than just sight alone or even sight with sound. It also implies that sound can be a better emotional trigger than sight.

In the context of LDR gifting, you can use sound to your advantage by choosing a gift related to sound. It can be as simple as sharing a playlist or as elaborate as organizing a limousine trip to where her favorite band is playing live. It can be the sound of your voice on his voicemail or a carefully curated collection of soothing sounds for him to go to sleep to. If you guys have been living near the ocean and she had to move to a place with no access to a beach, why not a recording of ocean sounds with your soothing voice laid on top?

When considering gifts for long-distance couples, be sure that it’s something that will trigger a memory of you in some way. That’s what makes it truly powerful. You certainly don’t want to treat her to front seat tickets at a Justin Bieber concert only to have it end with her leaving you for Biebs!

Buying the Perfect Graduation Gift: Ideas for Soon-to-be Empty Nesters

Finding the perfect graduation gift is a challenge for any parent who’s fledglings are ready to leave the nest. As it is, Graduation Day brings a mixed basket of emotions, some good, some sad, mostly nostalgic. You want your graduation day gift to be the beginning of a memory that will last a long time. Some soon-to-be empty nesters buy their kids cars when they’re ready to leave home, some make financial investments in their names, and some might even sponsor a “go find yourself” trip to Europe or the Far East before their son or daughter heads off to college.

 

Graduation gift ideas

On the other hand, graduation gifting doesn’t always have to be an expensive affair. Sure, you’ve probably set aside some money for this, but what if you don’t want to go the traditional way of buying a car or some plane tickets? What gift ideas should you be looking at in terms of broad categories? What’s the starting point for finding that perfect graduation gift? Here are 6 of the most popular categories of gifts that will be appreciated – hopefully, for a long time after they’re given.

Cold, Hard Cash is the King of Graduation Gifts

 

Money as a graduation gift - quote

Cash always tops the list of most-wanted gifts. And why not? As an etiquette expert from Florida points out: “It’s rarely returned, and one size fits all.” Cash is and always was the king of good times, and nothing says “take me, I’m yours” like a great big wad of dough or piles of neatly stacked currency notes.

But if you don’t want to be crass about it, how about throwing a ‘costume’ over the graduation day bundle you’re about to drop?

Idea 1: Put wads of money into new shoes and gift-wrap it in a proper shoebox. Imagine the look on their face when they struggle to get their toes in and find the cause of the obstruction!

Idea 2: This one’s adapted from an idea by blogger Izzy Anderson. Take several bills and tape them together end to end to create a long strip of money. Roll it into a tight roll that will fit on the inside of a tube of toilet paper. Sounds like fun already, right? Now, get the cardboard tube from a roll of toilet paper and cut a slit into the side about the width of a dollar bill, maybe just a little wider. Next, insert the roll of money into the tube with the slit and get the first bill to peep out of the tube. In the image below, they’ve used a Pull Me tab on the first bill.

 

There are literally hundreds of gift ideas for gifting cash, so get as creative as you like. Just make sure none of the bills are damaged in the process. To match the gift to your budget, use ones, fives, or twenties.

If cash just won’t cut it or you think it’s no fun receiving money (are you kidding me???), consider some other gift ideas. Here’s one that immediately comes to mind…

Jewelry: Graduation Gifts that Glimmer

“You can always tell what kind of a person a man really thinks you are by the earrings he gives you.”
― Audrey Hepburn

Ah, jewelry – another word that appeals to everyone but is like music to a girl’s ears! Diamonds, in particular, make excellent graduation gifts for young women. That doesn’t mean men won’t like it. A solitaire tie pin for a son off to do a corporate internship might be overkill, but how about a diamond-studded watch or platinum bracelet that can eventually become a family heirloom? Graduation is a fitting rite of passage for such precious gifts.

Jewelry needn’t always be of the expensive kind, either. Depending on what you plan to spend, you can consider a necklace and earring set, a bracelet, a finger ring, a locket, a pendant, a tie pin, an ear stud, and so on. The only problem with jewelry is that the appeal is very specific; be sure you know what she’ll love or he’ll appreciate before you go and splurge several hundred dollars or more on a jewelry item.

Investments as a Graduation Gift Idea

If you’re investment-savvy, you can consider gifting some long-term Treasury ETFs, or stocks from a defensive segment like consumer packaged goods or utilities. These can be sound investment choices in a volatile environment because they focus on essential goods that people will always need. It’s not as glamorous as owning stocks in Apple, Inc. perhaps, but shares in a soap company or one that makes toilet paper or a consistent dividend-grower can provide more than a little financial stability over several decades.

Also Read: 101 Gift Ideas for 2020

Always look at the long-term horizon when making an investment as a gift for someone else. Many thousands of millionaires have been created by the capital markets, and you want your graduate son or daughter to have a backup if they ever need it in the future. Don’t get sucked in by sure-money deals or things like mutual funds. Look for solidly-backed opportunities that are relatively low-risk and have yielded results for decades, through recessions and boom times alike.

Technology Gifts for Graduation Day

When you think of gifting technology, gadgets are probably the first things that come to mind. But remember that you’re looking for a very special gift, not the run-of-the-mill gift like the latest iPhone or Samsung S series smartphone. Why not a more practical gift, like a convertible notebook for a college freshman or a new home security system for a daughter moving to her own apartment?

For that matter, it doesn’t even have to be a physical product. How about a digital gift like a Netflix annual subscription or a year of Amazon Prime? These offer prolonged value and will be much appreciated. If you think about it, technology is a great enabler for the art of gift-giving.

Nuts and Bolts, a.k.a. Essential Gifts

This category of graduation gifts has a decidedly practical bent to it and there’s no end to the possibilities it brings. But you have to be careful to stay away from things that might look practical but hold very little actual value. An example of that: a son living off-campus and mostly eating take-out or home delivery won’t appreciate a dishwasher but one who loves cooking in his apartment and entertaining friends will thank you after every party.

Here are some of the other things you can consider gifting a graduate about to leave home for the great unknown:

  • Cooking utensils, silverware, or crockery
  • Clothing, shoes, accessories, etc.
  • Bed, mattress, bed linen, etc.
  • Appliances: microwave, hairdryer, coffee maker, toaster (ah, the classic wedding gift!), and so on
  • Computer, laptop, tablet, or smartphone
  • Toolbox with all the necessary tools
  • First-aid kit with specific medicines for your child
  • A food subscription plan for convenient meal delivery
  • Travel gear and accessories
  • Portable chargers, also known as power banks
  • Amazon Echo or any of the Alexa voice assistant products
  • Heavy appliances: air conditioner, washing machine, dryer, refrigerator, wall TV, deep freezer, oven, etc.
  • Vouchers, coupons, and digital discounts – perfect for the frugal graduate struggling to pay down their student loan!
  • A professional DSLR camera for the outdoorsy graduate who loves hiking, biking, and anything that keeps them moving.
  • A set of our own Friendship Lamps, perhaps?

There’s no dearth of websites telling you about the best graduation gift ideas, but we advise you to think it through and figure out what your now-adult child will find of practical value and for a prolonged period of time. Keep this in mind:

““They always gives me bath salts,” complained Nobby. “And bath soap and bubble bath and herbal bath lumps and tons of bath stuff and I can’t think why, ‘cos it’s not as if I hardly ever has a bath. You’d think they’d take the hint, wouldn’t you?””
― Terry Pratchett, Hogfather

Time and You: The Greatest Gifts of Them All

This might sound corny but the most valuable gift you can give as a graduation present for your precious child who’s going away is the gift of time. Communicating with Home Base is not something for your children to “get to it when they can”, especially for sensitive kids going out into a tough world. They might not have the financial safety net or social protection they enjoyed when they lived under your roof but you can certainly make sure they get the emotional support they need to get through the average week as an adult.

“The best gifts come from the heart, not the store.”
― Sarah Dessen, Lock and Key

Scheduling special FaceTime or Skype calls throughout the week is a great way to keep it consistent. Consider buying a video calling tool like the Echo Show or Echo Spot from Amazon or a 10″ Facebook Portal for a larger screen.

A word of caution is appropriate at this point: don’t overcommunicate. And that includes putting pressure on them to make every call on the schedule. Don’t let it be an obligation; it should be more of an open window when they know they can reach you for sure at those times. It’ll give them a tremendous sense of security and confidence knowing you’re there for them.

And God knows we could all use a little of both in our lives right now as the threat of the novel coronavirus COVID-19 starts cutting a swathe through a totally unprepared modern human civilization.

Our gift ideas for graduation will hopefully lighten the burden of separation. In these troubled times, we need something that brings us closer as a family. Gifts are a powerful way to make yourself present when you’re absent, to coin a new Master Oogway expression.

We’ll leave you with this final nugget of wisdom; not from Oogway but someone equally wise in the ways of the world:

“A gift consists not in what is done or given, but in the intention of the giver or doer.”
― Seneca, Moral Essays: Volume III

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